TITLE: Point of View
AUTHOR: Blaire Ryan
EMAIL: Redbat1@earthlink.net
RATING: PG-13
SUMMARY: Xander, the vampire slayer, watches one crazy day in the life of his friends, and heís not alone.
SPOILERS: nothing really, since this is AU.
PAIRING: Buffy/Anya, Xander/Kate, Tara/Spike, Willow/Xander(kind of).
DISTRIBUTION: You Got the Stones, Existence Crawls, and Eternal Bitca. Anyone else, email me and Iíll let ya have it.
DISCLAIMER: I donít own it. Big W does. No, not Bush, Whedon! Oh, and Point of View is sung by Blink 182
FEEDBACK: Desired like none other.
NOTES: Response to Challenge #101 at
You Got the Stones?

"Slayer is male (Xander), Buffy and Anya practice witchcraft (whether they are an item is up to the answerer) and Spike is the vengance demon and Willow is the implanted vampire."

Also, I apologize for my crappy Xander-writings. I blame it on the AU, I tell ya, the AU!
DEDICATION: To Ragna, for the challenges I have taken and yet to respond to. *sheepish grinning*

You know those days where you wake up, you look around, and you say, "How the hell did I get here?" Well, I was having one of those days. One of those days where you just sit and try to figure out where everything went wrong, or right. And no matter what you do, it still doesnít want to make sense. Itís just, all those little tiny small things get in the way. Maybe I should tell you about it, and you can see what I mean.

It started in the morning, as many odd days do. Waking up in my apartment, my slayer powers refreshing me after just a few hours of sleep, as usual. Also as usual, Kate and I did the fun naughty stuff to bring ourselves to full consciousness. It was then that things started working out strangely.

"Xander, do you ever think about kids?" I did a practical spit take on the notes Iíd been trying to study during breakfast. So much for eligble study materials for Lindsey to copy down

When I looked at Kate, to see if she was joking as I hoped she was, my confusion grew. Her usually decisive expression held this heartbreaking little pout that told me she was dissappointed with my reaction. "Um, wellÖ not soÖ umÖ no," I finally told her, feeling like a rat surrounded by hungry cats. I didnít want to hurt her feelings, I swear. I justÖ hadnít thought about it. I was the slayer, I didnít want to leave anyone behind with a kid if I was killed suddenly. Unfortunately, Kate didnít give me the chance to explain this to her.

"I knew it! Just because Iím not your first love, you donít consider me your mate! Iím just good for sex, arenít I?" Kate was standing and yelling, and before I could say another word, she ran from the apartment and out to her car. By the time I caught up, she was driving away, throwing one of my CDís out the window.

Okay, so it wasnít one of my biggest moments of slayerhood. I can be killed and come back to life, kill ascended demons, stop robot killing machines, but not explain the direness of my situation to my girlfriend? Things had been so much easier with Cordelia. She was a vampire, and couldnít even think of having kids. Well, it was easier until the whole "slept with her and she turned into Chase, Scourge of Africa" thing. Oh, that and the fact that she left me on the day of graduation, after a huge battle where I needed emotional support more than nearly ever before.

I sighed more than a few times, as I watched Kateís car drive off. I mean, what was I supposed to do. Kate may have looked like a twenty year old, but the Initiative had genetically engineered her only two years ago. She was still new with the emotion thing. Even though she had the knowledge of every book in the universityís library, and nearly my strength, she was little more than a well-learned child in emotional standards. I was just glad the Initiative wasnít pulling all the string any longer. That was too hard on all involved.

I know, Iím getting distracted from the point. About how my life has spun out of control, and not always for the worse. But then, Kate is definitely one of the "not worse" parts. She may be as emotionally uncontrolled as an eight year old, but I love her.

Anyway, I admitted defeat, and went inside for refuge. I wasnít too interested in seeing how long I could stay comfortable outside in a tee-shirt and boxers in the middle of January. Chosen One or not, I sure as hell didnít like to freeze to death.

Damn, this was not a good day already.

~~~

I donít think I can possibly say it enough. I hate this fucking town. Everything about it is always getting on every nerve Iíve got. Everything from the one "club", the substandard beer, the sunlight, but especially the damn people. I canít even scare them into giving me money anymore, because the wordís spread about what Iím doing. Iím just a weird girl in black that tries to get money for free. The stupid town was so oblivious, it took all the fun out of terror.

Now, of course, the terror was shortlived once my "victims" realizes I canít hurt them. I may be evil looking with the sharp teeth and all, but with a chip in my head, Iím just Willow. A vampire that was stupid enough to get a chip stuck in her head.

So, here I am, sitting around Liamís apartment, watching the cutesy-tootsy witches talk about whatever the hell theyíre doing at the Uni and I could puke blood just thinking about it. Anya was far better when she was just one of the slayerís annoying little nerd-friends. Now that sheís all self-confident and girl-loving she just drives me batty.

"Will you two bleedin wiccas just get a room?" I growled threateningly at them, which made Buffy shrink back like usual, but it just made Anya roll her eyes.

"If you donít like it Willow, you can always leave," She didnít even bother to look at me again, just went back to talk to the still nervous Buffy. That made me more pissin mad, just as she knew it would. Ignoring me like I was a common house cat.

"Bugger all, I would. If I hadnít been *stuck* here by the unemployed watcher there," I sent a growl in the direction of the kitchen where Liam was making some call or other. "Donít know why I bother with bringing you people information anyway. Might as well just let the world end and get it all over with."

"Oh quit whining Willow. Youíre just lucky Xander leaves you undustlike. After betraying us to Riley like that. And donít even mention that demon you killed, like you did it as a favor to us," Tara said as she walked in the door, Spike on her arm in his usual possessive manner.

I didnít even bother to respond to the twit. I could have, I had seen her the night before wearing the ridiculous outfit at the drive-up diner, but I kept it in. No use wasting energy on loser-girl.

It wasnít like I had anywhere else to go, anyway.

~ ~ ~

I was finally able to get ahold of Kate a few hours later. I told her how Cordelia was long out of my life, and how much I loved her. She confessed on the phone that sheíd thought she was late, but stress over how committed I was was the cause, not pregnancy, according to the doctor and her own thought-processes.

So, with Kateís promised to make it up to me for my CDís sheíd been throwing out the window for half the day, she hung up leaving me with a smirk on my face. Iíd never quite heard her use *those* words before. All I had to do was go on patrol, and Kateíd be waiting for me when I got back.

It wasnít a bad patrol. Just one vamp rising out of his grave, and not exactly a difficult kill. It was pretty much how I wished typical patrols would goÖ until I saw Willow sitting on a grave muttering to herself.

Immediately getting that annoyed feeling, I was tempted to walk up and push her off the grave into a freshly-opened whole below her. But, realizing sheíd already killed one of the vampires for me, I decided to just shove her off to the side.

She did her usual growl and glare when she stood up, wiping the dirt off her precious leather jacket. I made a note to ask her where sheíd gotten it sometime.

"Slayer."

"Willow," I acknowledged.

"Whatís wrong, youíre not pummeling me as usual?" Willow noticed, probably dissappointed, knowing her.

I grinned, "Just donít feel like it Willow."

Shaking her head, she reached into the jacket and pulled out a cigarette and her lighter. "Thatís your problem, slayer. You donít see the world as it is. It sucks, and you canít do anything about it. You could die in five seconds or five minutes from some random demon. Doesnít that bother you?"

I thought about it for a moment, then shook my head. "Nope. We all die Willow. Besides, in my point of view, the world ainít that bad."

Willow shook her head. "You know what Slayer?"

Curious, "What?"

"You have a shitty point of view."

The End

Two different people, two different places

Through a one way window with two different faces

Agreements are not reached, faces are forgotten

The other person's shoes, you have got in

Stubborn minded enclosed to your own world

Wake up and see someone else's morals

Want is right to you

Might be true

It's a different point of view to you

You cannot see things that are different to me

And I can't understand why you cannot see

The things that I cannot see

I see what you don't see

I see what you don't see

Turn around and the shadows are all around me

Two different people, two different places

Through a one way window with two different faces

Agreements are not reached, faces are forgotten

The other person's shoes, you have got in