(Supernatural Romantic Suspense) Mourning messed up woman artist meets mysterious English photographer who leads her to a demon filled destiny and possible apocalypse.
The current draft is aprox. 60 pages long in 12pt Times. Looking for some sincere and well thought out feedback as well as reader suggestions for where they would like to see the story go from here.
To be a beta reader please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I'll send you the story and you'll be on your way. Much thanks in advance!
“Hey,” she called from the doorway.
He sat up instantly, awake and reaching for his sword.
“Whoa,” Aleigh said. “Slow down there. It’s just me.”
“What’s going on?” he asked.
“Nothing. I just thought we could have some wine and a chat.”
He looked from her to the bottles and back again.
“Oh come on. I’m bored,” Aleigh said.
He continued to hesitate.
“Don’t make me beg Sean. At least let me have one more night of normalcy. Who knows when I’ll ever be able to sit around drinking wine with a handsome man again?”
His face changed a bit, softening with feeling. Her guilt-trip approach had worked.
“Okay, but there will be no getting drunk. We’ll be fodder for the Watchers if we drop our guard.”
“Yeah, okay whatever. Let’s go sit by the sea.” Aleigh led the way through the door, calling over her shoulder “And no more demon talk.”
Sean sighed, something he seemed to be doing a lot of lately, and followed his charge out into the fading daylight.
Two and a half hours later they were polishing off their second bottle of wine and were as at ease with each other as old friends.
“You know I just realized something,” Aleigh said.
“What’s that?” Sean asked.
“One of my parents was an angel.” She took a deep breath and another sip of wine. “Wow, that sounds pretty bizarre.”
Sean was quiet and for a moment as they both gazed up into the night sky.
“Your father,” Sean said. “He was the angel.”
“I guess that’s why he couldn’t stick around.”
“Yes, well angels don’t get to stay down here unless they're banished.”
“So he’s up there somewhere?” Aleigh asked gesturing towards the stars.
“Well, I don’t think there’s anything ‘up there’ really except a bunch of space. But metaphorically speaking yes, he’s um… out there somewhere. He might even be able to see you now… might have even watched you grow up.”
Aleigh snorted, laughing a bit. “God, I hope not. I think he’d be sorely disappointed.”
“Right now maybe,” Sean laughed. “Sitting around drinking with me might disappoint any father.”
They chuckled together at Sean’s self deprecating remark and refilled their glasses.
“My ass is getting sore,” Aleigh said.
They sat balancing their weight on a large piece of drift wood that had washed up on shore long ago from some forgotten place.
“Wait here,” Sean said handing Aleigh his glass and headed towards the house.
Moments later he returned with a blanket under his arm. He spread it out on top of the small patch of sand near the edge of the water. When he was done he grabbed his glass from Aleigh and took a seat on the blanket. Aleigh followed, easing down onto the ground with an unsteady huff. So much for not getting drunk.
“Ah, that’s better,” she said.
Sean smiled at her and leaned back in the sand. His gaze fixed on the constellations spiraling by the billions above them.
“There’s Cassiopia,” Sean said.
“And the Big Dipper,” Aleigh said.
“Um… there’s Venus.”
“And the North Star.”
“Okay, I’m done. I don’t know any more.”
Aleigh laughed. “Well, there’s Orion and the Seven Sisters.” She pointed to places in the sky leaning towards him so that he could follow her finger. Their faces were only inches apart. Aleigh could smell his skin. It was a smell she was quickly becoming accustomed to.
“I only see six sisters,” he said.
“The seventh one is hiding,” Aleigh replied, shifting towards him on her elbow and downing more wine before continuing. “Her name was Merope. She was a Greek goddess who was so shamed after loving a mortal that she vowed to hide her face for eternity.”
Sean held another of his common silences, letting his thoughts wander into Aleigh’s story. “That’s sad. It’s not right to feel ashamed of love.”
“No, it isn’t,” Aleigh said, leaning in closer to him and letter her mouth become so close to his that she could feel his breath on her face. The wine had made its way to her head and she was past the point of playing hard to get. Oh, who was she kidding? She was the easiest woman she knew.
Sean gently grabbed her upper arms and sat up, holding her at arms length. He decided not to reject her again and hoped simply changing the subject wouldn’t be too transparent.
“I’m hungry. Are you hungry?” Sean didn’t give her a chance to respond. “Let’s go in and get a bite.”
Labels: Misc. Mutterings