01.19.97 - Gone

My Gran is gone. She passed quietly this afternoon in her sleep. I can't put anything into words - I can't think at all. She was my strength. She raised me and taught me all I know. What will I do now? How will Mum and I ever get along without her to guide us? I want to scream! I can't talk now. I need to cry or cut my flesh open to make the pain inside hurt less - I can't do this now. I can't....